Couples therapy session notes: template, outline and example

A couples therapy session note is the written trace of a session with two partners. It covers what each partner is asking for, what happened between them and what comes next.

What a couples therapy session note is for

In couples therapy, you see two people who do not tell the same story. The note first helps you remember who said what, from one session to the next. It also tracks what each partner wants, which is not always the same at the start.

If a partner disputes what was said or asks for their file, a dated, factual note is your best support.

If you also see families, the systemic and family therapy session note offers a wider outline, with a genogram and hypotheses. This article focuses on what is specific to couples.

The legal points below concern France. Belgium and Switzerland have their own rules, covered in the article linked in the access section.

One file or two?

No French text imposes a model. Two set-ups are common.

One file for the couple

All joint sessions go in a single file, in both partners' names. It is simple to keep. The limit shows as soon as there are individual sessions, or if the couple separates.

One file per person

Joint sessions are linked to both files. Individual sessions stay in the file of the person seen alone. It is clearer if a partner asks for their data or carries on alone.

Decide at the first meeting and write your choice in the first note.

The rule on secrets, set at the first meeting

Sooner or later, one partner will tell you alone something they do not want to say in front of the other. Both should know the rule before that happens.

Three positions are common among couples therapists. They are practices, not obligations.

• No secrets between sessions. What one partner tells you alone may be brought back into a joint session. You say so from the start.
• Limited secrets. You keep the confidence, but you may ask the person to raise it themselves in session if it is blocking the work.
• Confidential individual sessions. What is said alone stays between you and that person.

None of these positions is imposed by law. Explain yours to both partners, then note in the file that it was explained, with the date.

If you are a psychologist in France, Article 7 of the 2021 code of ethics states that professional secrecy covers everything you learn in the course of your work. What each partner confides in you is part of it.

In the note, a confidence shared alone does not go in the joint session report. It goes in the file of the person who shared it, or in a separate section. This separation does not necessarily shield it from an access request, as explained below.

The outline, heading by heading

You do not need to fill in every heading each time. Keep the same order, it makes the note quick to reread.

1. Session details

Date, session number, length, in the practice or remote, joint or individual session.

2. Who attended

Both partners, or one. Write down an absence as it was explained, without interpreting it.

3. What each partner wants

At the start, each partner's request in their own words, separately. After that, only what changes.

4. Topics covered

The topics of the session, in a few lines.

5. What each partner says

Attribute each important statement to the person who made it. Write "Ms A. says that" rather than "the couple thinks that".

6. What happens between them

What you observe in the exchange, as facts. Who starts, who goes quiet, what raises the tension, what eases it.

7. Working hypotheses

Your hypotheses, presented as such and kept apart from what the partners reported. One or two lines are enough. You revisit them as sessions go on.

8. Your interventions

What you suggested or reframed, and how each partner responded.

9. Points to watch

Anything that needs particular attention, written as facts. If violence is mentioned, write down what was said, by whom, with the date, and what you did next.

10. Next steps

The task suggested if there is one, the topics to pick up, the date of the next appointment and any planned individual session.

Filled-in example

This example is fictional. It concerns a couple seen for the third time. Names are replaced by initials.

• Session details. Joint session no. 3, 60 minutes, in the practice.
• Who attended. Ms A. and Mr B.
• What each partner wants. No change since the first session. Ms A. wants "time together again". Mr B. wants "less criticism about how the house is run".
• Topics covered. An argument last weekend about the summer holidays. How chores are shared since Ms A. went back to work.
• What each partner says. Ms A. says she feels alone in planning everything. Mr B. says he does not know what is expected of him "until it is said". Both say the argument calmed down faster than usual.
• What happens between them. Mr B. turns to the therapist to answer. Ms A. raises her voice when he talks about "helping out". The mood eases when each describes a typical day.
• Working hypotheses. Each partner's expectations seem to be rarely voiced to the other, more than the sharing of chores itself. To check at the next session.
• Interventions. Each partner's expectations reframed as concrete requests. Suggestion to list the week's chores together.
• Points to watch. Nothing in particular.
• Next steps. They will draw up the list together once a week. Next session in a fortnight. No individual session planned.

The note contains no judgement on either partner, no diagnosis and nothing either one confided alone.

If a partner asks for the file

Everyone has the right to access the data that concerns them. This right comes from Article 15 of the GDPR. The CNIL, the French data protection authority, explains it on its right of access page. According to the CNIL, the reply must come within one month at most, which can be extended to three months depending on how complex the request is. Exercising this right is free.

With a couple, both partners appear in the same notes. The CNIL states that only the requester's own data can be released under the right of access, and that third parties' identities can be masked. But in a joint session, what the other partner says is also part of the requester's own therapy.

The CADA (the French commission on access to administrative documents) ruled on a similar case in opinion no. 20130447 of 21 February 2013. It concerned family therapy at a public hospital. A father asked for the notes of the joint sessions. The CADA held that these notes concerned the health of each person who shared the therapy. It gave a favourable opinion on releasing them, without masking the passages about his wife and children. This opinion concerns a public hospital, not a private practice, and it is not about a couple. It only shows how such notes can be read.

The French Public Health Code (Article L1111-7) sets a separate regime for information held by health professionals and health institutions. Service-public.fr summarises its rules. The deadline is 8 days, or 2 months if the information is more than five years old, after a 48-hour reflection period. Information gathered from third parties who are not involved in the care, or about such third parties, is not released. For a psychologist or psychotherapist in private practice, no text clearly says whether this article applies. So be careful before relying on its deadlines or on the third-party exception. The GDPR applies in every case.

In practice, write each note on the assumption that both partners may read it. If you are unsure what you can release, ask your professional body or a lawyer, without missing the deadline.

The article Can patients see their therapist’s notes? covers deadlines, personal notes and the rules in Belgium and Switzerland in more detail.

Separation during therapy

Write down the decision as it was announced, by whom and on what date, and what was agreed next.

If one partner continues with you alone, open an individual file in their name from that date. Joint session notes stay where they were. Do not copy into the new file what the former partner said in session.

A partner may also ask you for a written statement or a copy of the notes for legal proceedings. An access request is handled under the rules above. For a statement, stick to what you observed yourself, and seek advice if in doubt.

Common mistakes

• Writing "the couple says" instead of attributing each statement to the right person.
• Slipping into the joint note something one partner confided alone.
• Taking sides through word choice, for example "he refuses" on one side and "she explains" on the other.
• Diagnosing one partner from what the other says about them.
• Not writing down the rule on secrets, then forgetting what was announced.

Taking notes with Delta

Delta is the clinical assistant for mental health and allied health professionals. You have two ways to take notes. During the session, Delta transcribes what is said. Or, after the session, you dictate your observations. You can also add written notes.

Delta then generates the session report, with a short summary, a detailed summary and topics for the next session. It updates the patient record, so you can find the whole therapy and how it has evolved in one place.

In a joint session, the transcription concerns both partners. Get each one's agreement, as explained in the article on patient consent for AI note-taking. Always reread the report, especially who said what.

Data is hosted in France with an HDS-certified host. The patient's name is pseudonymised before it reaches the AI, no audio file is kept and data is never used to train a model. The trial lasts 14 days, with no card required. Delta does not handle scheduling or billing, it works alongside your practice software.

Further reading

• Systemic and family therapy session note, template and example
• Can patients see their therapist’s notes? France guide
• Professional secrecy, psychologists and AI
• HDS-certified hosting for practitioners
• Software for therapists, how to choose
• Delta for therapists

Frequently asked questions

Sources

• CNIL, Le droit d'accès (right of access), in French
• Service-public.fr, Dossier médical (access to medical records, checked on 28 February 2025), in French
• CADA opinion no. 20130447 of 21 February 2013, family therapy and third parties (AP-HP legal affairs), in French
• French code of ethics for psychologists, 2021 version, in French
• Info.gouv.fr, Violences faites aux femmes, quels recours pour les victimes, in French